iPhone user survey gives excuses to dump gadget-undesirable romantic partners
Posted Nov 4th 2009 5:00PM by Megan Lavey
My beloved fiancé,It is with great sadness that I write you at home to your Gmail account to inform you that I am intending to sell your ring on Ebay and we will part ways. You see, ours was a mixed relationship to begin with. You have your Windows 7, your Linux, your original Android phone from T-Mobile in the UK. I have my iPhone, my iMac and everything good that's Apple (and even a few pieces that aren't).
That's why I know it'll never work out between us. According to a recent study from Retrevo, iPhone owners believe that a "cool gadget" makes a person far more attractive than the measly doctorate you've spent years studying for. Every time we are together, I can't help but shudder over the fact that your Android phone is not of the latest generation.
So forget the four years of history between us, the months of separation due to our being in two different countries, and the fact that you are a wonderful, kind, sweet, and intelligent man with a bright future ahead of you. I have someone else I think the world of, and it is my iPhone. Now if you'll excuse me, I must go watch adult material and post up an ad at Match.com for someone with a 3GS.
Much love,
Your dear departed Megan
P.S. This letter is satire, I'm not dumping my fiance over his gadget preferences. Love you, honey!
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Jeff said 5:10PM on 11-04-2009
Is megan dead? I think that's what "departed" means...
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Megan Lavey said 6:37PM on 11-04-2009
Congratulations! You've discovered that Megan really passed away three months ago and now all of her posts are being written by zombies.
Hobbes said 5:12PM on 11-04-2009
Rather than dump them, make them switch to an all Mac goodness. That's what I did with my loved one and friends. Unless, of course, this is just one excuse to dump the person.
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Ken said 5:19PM on 11-04-2009
Now that's funny! Thanks for ending my Wednesday with a laugh!
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starq said 6:29PM on 11-04-2009
" ... everything good that's Apple (and even a few pieces that aren't ..."
So you gave up on Apple Mice too huh Megan?
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Megan Lavey said 6:37PM on 11-04-2009
Yeah, that Mighty Mouse purchase was money that I'll never see again. The one that came with my iMac is now safely hidden.
Monica said 7:04PM on 11-04-2009
Oh Apple, how you inspire so much with so little. As far as I'm concerned, the new hotness is the Sony Xperia X10 running Android 2.0. The hardware is far far above that of Apple, and far above that of even whatever iPhone 4 will be. As for the software. Apple's end game was always apps, but as far as I know Android now has around 10,000, which is a whole lot more then we need.
OK, don't get upset, it was bound to happen! I can't wait till the X10 comes out so I can lose the iPhone toy and finally get a real phone.
Monica S
Los Angeles Computer Repair
http://www.sebecomputercare.com
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TheBigKlosowski said 11:00PM on 11-04-2009
I'm to the point with the iPhone where it is no longer sexy. Originally attracted to it because it was sleek and new, our relationship has grown cold. She doesn't let me do the things I want to do - like use Google Voice or have Flash in my browser. She isn't reliable, dropping or mangling calls at the worst moment. I'm afraid I'm dumping her this week for her much more open minded friend - Droid.
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ilkyone said 2:04PM on 11-05-2009
Hah! ROTFLMAO
You forgot the 1337 closing tag:
have fun with the moto build quality of late, too!
krizoitz said 9:35PM on 11-05-2009
Wow, a survey thats negative about Apple product users from a site that is hostile towards Apple? Next you are going to tell me that Rush Limbaugh doesn't like the President!
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